DOES THIS SOUND LIKE A GOOD COMIC?

Okay I have to write a comic and if you have a better idea PLEASE comment.

1st Box:

Mom tells baby girl "Were going to chucky cheese today!" The baby with a thought bubble that says Great that huge cheese person scares me,

2nd Box:

Mom takes daughter walk in and see chucky cheese person then the daughter hides and is scared

3rd box:

Mom says whats wrong hes not scary or anythingg

then have a scary chucky cheese dude with weird eyes and mouth and nose and make his super scaryDOES THIS SOUND LIKE A GOOD COMIC?
What would make this funny is if the little girl dresses herself for battle. You have a panel showing the warm and fuzzy friendly atmosphere at Chucky Cheese and the almost bucolic figure of our friend Chuck and then the little girl in a combat helmet and fatigues.DOES THIS SOUND LIKE A GOOD COMIC?
Obviously if the grammar was better... Itll be okay... Not astonishingly good... The idea sounds a little cliched, but the details are fresh :)DOES THIS SOUND LIKE A GOOD COMIC?
hahahahahah yeah that sounds pretty good hahahahahaha good job i like the scary chucky cheese thing funny

helly hansen